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I haven't written in awhile, but there's an excuse. I have been crying my eyes out and being kept from ending it all. I should have expected it when he locked me in the tower. I wasn't sick. I can't even see the damned page. What happened to the brother I loved? My best friend? How could he do such. I can't think about him. For the first time I want to strangle him, to beat him and at the same time I won't him to hold me and tell me it's all been a bad dream. What does he plan? Why keep Darius a secret? My...I can't look outside my one window anymore, the land all covered in snow. It must have been so cold and lonely. I want to go with him now, go with him and his father, I know now that Sar sent him off to die. A baby is supposed to be kept warm. Goddess, he must have thought no one loved him. His cries torture me even though I've never heard them. He's keeping me from death, the room has been stripped bare of anything I could use to commit suicide...even the one window has been barred and a warmth spell put in this tower to keep me from catching my death. Imprisoned, my fiancé sent to his death, my baby...exposed... Sorry, I had to stop to regain my composure, blinded by the tears and surprised I still have some. Sar is dead to me now, and Sylvanus will pay, I will make sure of it one day, after, I have gained my freedom. Saronai :: remember :: |
Letting go...
